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Codzienna dawka humoru:

Idzie turysta po szlaku i nagle slyszy:
- ?o Jezuuu!!! Jezu, Jezu, Jezusicku!!!!
Biegnie, patrzy a tu baca siedzi na pienku, obok wbita siekiera:
- ?o Jezu, Jezu, Jezu!
Turysta:
- Baco! Baco co wam sie stalo?!
Baca:
- Mnie? Nic. ?o Jezuuuu!!! Jezu, Jezu, Jezu!!!
Turysta:
- A moz komus w waszej rodzinie?
Baca:
- Mojej? Ni. ?o Jezu, Jezu, Jezu, Jezusicku!!!
Turysta:
- No to co tak lamentujecie?
Baca:
- ?o Jezu, jak mi sie robic nie chce!

Nawet papier toaletowy wie, ze aby zyc trzeba sie rozwijac.

kuna z kondorem (p. wersja dla purystow jezykowych: kuma z kondorem)

Bylo szaro, jest kolorowo.

stala para

Nauczyciel na lekcji polskiego pyta sie Jasia:
- Jaki to czas? Ja sie kapie, ty sie kapiesz, on sie kapie...
- Sobota wieczor, panie profesorze.

A Canadian is having his petit dejeuner (coffee, croissants, bread, butter jam) when an American man, chewing gum, sits down next to him.
The Canadian ignores the American who, nevertheless, starts a conversation.
American: "You Canada folk eat the whole bread??"
Canadian (in a bad mood): "Of course."
American: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We dont. In the States, we only eat what is inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, transform them into croissants and sell them to Canada."
The American has a smirk on his face. The Canadian listens in silence.
The American persists: "Dya eat jelly with the bread??"
Canadian: "Of Course." American: (cracking his gum between his teeth and chuckling). "We dont. In the States we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and sell the jam to Canada."
The Canadian then asks: "Do you have sex in America?"
American: "Why of course we do", the American says with a big smirk.
Canadian: And what do you do with the condoms once you ve used them?"
American: "We throw them away, of course."
Canadian: "We dont. In Canada, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum and sell them to America."

Czym rozni sie blondynka od lodowki?
- Do lodowki mozna jeszcze wsadzic jajka.

Gdzie kucharek szesc... tam cyckow dwanascie.

kul pod kaprem